The Way of the Warrior

The Way of the Warrior

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:25 am

Prologue

The dark corridor echoed with the sound of footsteps as a figure made his way across quickly to escape a pursuer. He did not even bother to look back at who or what was behind it; All that mattered was the path ahead...

Finally, he reached the end of the corridor and the next thing he knew, he was looking down at a great darkness below. He had to make a decision quickly whether it would be to face the pursuers or to take his chances with a leap.

"There he is! Do not let him get away!" came the sound of angered voices. At that, the figure jumped into the great darkness. What awaited him below, no one knew...
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Last edited by Razorfane X on Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:55 am; edited 1 time in total

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:40 am

Quite short... For an introduction.
_________________

Sig Rule-3 lines of text max, 475x175 size

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 8:46 am

Very bland and it's not quite clear (in your intro or the topic header) who this is about.
_________________

This is my Bankai

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 9:12 am

Chapter 1

As he fell, he thought of what would become of him after this fall. Surely he would die from this height but then again, stranger things have happened...

As he saw the earth below him, he braced himself for the impact that would prove fatal. As he was about to land, a flying creature,a gryphon with a rider had saved him from death.

"I thank you, great one for saving my life. For whatever it's worth, my name is Rexxar," said he.

"Ah yes, pleased to meet you, I'm Mangix," the panda said with a smile.

"If I may, Mangix, what is one such as you doing in these parts at this time of night?" Rexxar asked.

"No reason, really. I was just around when you fell. I like traveling around in the sky at night with my gryphon. I call him Lucky and once again, he has blessed another with his luck!" Mangix laughed, "Ah but that aside, let's get back to my house and talk about this matter."

"I thank you for your hospitality Mangix but I don't want to be a burden." Rexxar declined.

Mangix shook his head, "No, no, I insist! Besides, I can tell that you're not even familiar with this area."

"Well, I can't argue with that..." Rexxar muttered as he and Mangix headed home on Lucky.
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 9:29 am

Yay razorfane's back
interesting start but i think you're saying a couple of things twice or more times.
"As he fell, he thought of what would become of him after this fall. Surely he would die from this height but then again, stranger things have happened...

As he saw the earth below him, he braced himself for the impact that would prove fatal."

says the same thing a couple of times. It could be changed to. (not sure if "stranger things have happened" has significance or not)

"He was certainly falling to his death, his eyes glinted with <choice for characterization> as the potent earth quickly approached."

Still, very nice concept. keep writing i'll be reading :P
_________________
The people we have lost...and the dreams that have faded...never forget them...
FF-X

On the eigth day the lords said "let there be awesomeness" and there was me.

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:01 am

Quite short and check some errors in typing.

I loved the humor and story plot of this, do continue. I'll be glad to read more from you ^^
_________________
Wanna laugh and remove stress?(note: ready your heart) PM me your reactions ^^
>> link : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_giciv2AQU

"Practice makes perfect but nobody's perfect. So, why practice?"

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:07 am

Wtf is a panda doing riding a Gryphon.
LOL
_________________

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:34 am

A panda riding a gryphon named "Lucky"... no comment at this point.
_________________

This is my Bankai

Back to top

Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 2:24 pm

It's been a LONG time since I've written again so maybe I've lost my touch a bit so yeah, I'm still trying to get it back. Anyway, this next story I'm working on takes on more of a comedic point at times. Next chapter will be out in a while, just need to brainstorm a little more...
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Back to top

Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 2:46 am

Chapter 2

"We're not too far from home, hope you're fine with flying a bit more," the panda said with concern.

"It is no trouble at all Mangix, I've always dreamed of flying at one point in life and this is the closest I've ever gotten to it. If I'm a burden, I apologize, not only to you but to Lucky as well." Rexxar said.

"Don't talk like that, you're no burden!" Mangix assured as they caught a glimpse of what looked like a house on a cliffside in the distance.

"Hm?" Rexxar wondered, "you live on a cliffside?"

"Why, yes I do! You're quite sharp in this darkness." Mangix laughed.

They landed at Mangix's house which was a nice, simple, wooden house with enough room for all three of them to fit.

"Come on in, I'll show you around," said Mangix, welcoming Rexxar into his home.

"Thank you, Mangix and also to you, Lucky," Rexxar said with a smile

I'm glad I could be of help. Lucky said

Rexxar was surprised to hear the gryphon talk to him. He did not realize that his power as a beastmaster had grown so much as he entered Mangix's house.

Mangix lead him to a simple quest room and said, "You can stay here if you want, no one uses this room anyway. Oh, but before you rest, would you like some ale?"

"No thank you, I don't drink," Rexxar respectfully refused as he lay down and fell asleep immediately...
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Back to top

Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:12 am

Even I am back my internet was down for quite a lon time. And i am not onna take up my old stories. I just lost track of them. I mit start afresh. And i concur with burnside. Also, i dont suppose a person wo as escaped instant deat wont be makin normal talk. Tou sould describe the emotions in retin detail.
_________________
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck can chuck wood?

Back to top

Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:05 am

Rexxar is quite a calm and composed warrior who lets his actions speak for him so I think that his conversation with Mangix is just fine for the time being.
_________________

Chapter 3

Back at the dark tower from where Rexxar escaped, something was brewing.

"How could you fools lose him! He was unarmed and yet you fools allowed him to escape!" thundered a demonic voice that shook the very foundations of the tower.

"W-we apologize, L-l-lord Azgalor, b-but he was t-too quick for us!" stuttered the patrol captain in fear of the Pit Lord.

"BAH!" yelled Azgalor as he decapitated the captain without hesitation.

"I will not stand for this incompetence, now go out there and find Rexxar!" thundered Azgalor once again, causing all the patrol units to initiate a thorough search for Rexxar.

He must not be allowed to escape from me... Azgalor thought.

Meanwhile...

"Hey Lucky, what do you think of Rexxar?" Mangix asked.

I can understand him, unfortunately, only Rexxar understands what I am saying Lucky thought as he just nodded as an answer, frustrated at his inability to talk to anyone but Rexxar.

"Yeah, he seems to have had a rough time. I still wonder though why he was being chased..."

I've been wondering about that myself... But if there is one who can free me from this curse, it's Rexxar... thought Lucky.
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Back to top

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:26 am

nice, continuing it soon?
_________________
The people we have lost...and the dreams that have faded...never forget them...
FF-X

On the eigth day the lords said "let there be awesomeness" and there was me.

Back to top

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:34 am

awesome
CONTINUEEE
_________________

Back to top

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 10:39 am

I'll continue it this weekend, schoolwork's got me occupied as of now
_________________
Choose your words carefully

Back to top

Reply to topic
Page 1 of 5    Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next



View previous topic   View next topic
All times are GMT

Display posts from previous:  All Posts1 Day7 Days2 Weeks1 Month3 Months6 Months1 Year Oldest FirstNewest First 

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You can download files in this forum

Jump to:  Select a forum General----------------AnnouncementsWelcome BoothBugs & SuggestionsRules and Regulations Dota Allstars----------------Latest ReleasesQuestions and AnswersHeroesItemsGeneral DiscussionsDream HeroesDream ItemsDotA ReplaysPremium DotA ReplaysThe Library Chit Chat----------------EtceteraJoke TimeGraphics CenterOther GamesFan FictionThe Armory Playing Online----------------Organized GamesHamachi Servers Archives----------------Dota Allstars ArchivesChitChat ArchivesDS Surveys

DotaStrategy.com Forum Index    .    Fan Fiction