Bear joke part 1

Bear joke part 1

Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 6:15 am

Here's a joke I heard from my brother:

There was once a young man who completly refused to believe in god and was a self-proclaimed atheist. On day on a lone hike in the hills he was confronted by a large bear whos was apparently hungry....

The bear's paw was ready to strike him down when he whimpered "Oh god".... Suddenly the bear stopped, so did the stream that was running nearby and so did the birds that were flying in midair.... Jesus Chirst then desended in all his glory and said, "Son, you refused to believe in god uptil now, what made you whimper his name now?"

At this the man said, "Lord! Forgive me! How wrong I was to not have believed! Forgive me!" after which he started crying.

As the all forgiving lord, Jesus said, "Son, you have made a grave mistake in your life but I shall forgive you, speak...what is it you desire most now?"

As the man had heard of the benevolence of christ and his disiples he replied, "Lord....let this bear be a christian from thus day forth!"

At this Jesus said"So be it!" and ascended to heaven. The birds resumed flying, the river started flowing again but the bear remaind motionless for a full minute.

After this the bear spoke- "Thank yoiu lord for the food we eat..." and promptly ate the man.

PS I ain't christian.
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Posted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:56 pm

Lol don't make animals believe in God!
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Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 5:41 am

Magina easily dies with disables.

Not bad joke

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Posted: Mon May 05, 2008 2:00 pm

umm... a bit crude, but pretty amusing

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Posted: Mon Nov 24, 2008 5:22 am

lol
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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 5:34 am

Served the man right? Ha ha ha ha ha.................
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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 6:54 am

okay Part 2:

There was a bear and a rabbit who always fought with each other. One day they found the magic lamp and a genieappeared to give them 3 wishes each. The wishes are as follows.

Bear: Genie make me the only male bear in this area.
(as so it was! The only man with the ladies!)

Rabbit: I wish for a black biker jacket.
(and so it was!)

Bear: *scratching his head* Make me the only male bear in this enite forest!
(and so it was! He was the ALPHA MALE!!)

Rabbit: I want a bike
*starts revving up the bike*

Bear: You know what? MAKE ME THE ONLY MALE BEAR IN THE WORLD!!!
(and so it was! HE WAS LE NUMERO UNO MALE BEAR!)

Rabbit: Genie...........................................
.................................
.................................
,.............................
..........................
.........................
..............
............
....
TURN THIS BEAR IN A FEMALE BEAR TOO!

(and SO IT WAS!!)
*Rabbit sets off on the bike*
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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 8:05 am

Lol. Poor bear got screwed.

…
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